porn before sleep. obviously.

In the ten minutes before I head off to bed (and while the cast and crew are still out at the Lex), I give you the thoughts that ran through my head at the Roxie, while watching the premire of In Search of the Wild Kingdom, Pink and White’s newest, funniest porn.
…Damn. Porn on [...]

Read Full Post »

we could have been friends.

Margaret Cho and I, we could have been tight. Best buds, I’m sure. Bff, if you will.
But I won’t, because I didn’t get elected to the board yesterday. Ms. Cho is a board member here at GV, and should I have been elected, her and I would have been fast friends, swear [...]

Read Full Post »

are YOU a good lover?

Okay, so I’m on my lunch break, checkin’ out my Google homepage for the latest news (about sex, gay people, and reproductive rights), and I see “Are You Good in Bed?”. Being the quiz fan that I am, I click on the link.
This is what happened, not even five minutes ago:
Question 1:Your partner’s going through [...]

Read Full Post »

suggestions.

Things that could bring sexy back to your relationship:
Be prepared. If you want sex to happen more, you need to be ready! Lube, good clean toys, breathmits if you need ‘em, a friend who will watch the kids at the last minute.
Be intimate. This cannot be overemphasized. Kiss your partner before you go to [...]

Read Full Post »

in a minute.

Later today I’ll have my suggestions for the question below. However, before that I just wanted to update y’all on the bakery question.
Apparently I made the bakery up, or so it seems so far. No one who responded from my high school remembers a bakery that sold porn in the back. Not [...]

Read Full Post »

sex in maine.

Maine is Vacationland. Did you know that?

Makes sense to know that’s where I’m from, doesn’t it? About two weeks ago I logged onto GoogleMaps and looked up my old house on my old street, and remembered the meaning of “Middle of Nowhere.”
I’m sure many people wouldn’t guess that fucking in the middle of [...]

Read Full Post »

yelping in dorky happiness.

Okay, real quick, I’m gonna admit what I’ve been doing for the last half hour or so: reading through the reviews of my store on Yelp!
It makes me smile (as I sit here in my pj’s watching Body of Evidence on CourtTv) to hear how much people appreciate how hard we work at keeping [...]

Read Full Post »

finding holes and water.

Format:
Comment
Review
Tip/Answer to a question.

Comment:
This morning, driving past the Holey Bagel store in Noe Valley, I said to my girlfriend, “I wonder how many things I would try to put my penis in if I had one.” We chatted about this for a minute, and the conversation ended with her calling me a “big ol’ [...]

Read Full Post »